Helping people without expectation is something I learnt this year. Never too late, eh? I never used to expect much but would always smile when a thank you was offered. You know, just someone saying thank you or feeling the gratitude that you have extended yourself to help them? Yes, I kind of expected a thank you or at the very least, have the feeling that the person I helped feels thankful just by their smile. Until the people I helped stabbed me in the back. I found it so hard to accept that the people whom I had helped and had only good intentions for would have the heart to make ill of me. I suppose there are all sorts to make the world interesting. It hurt but I learnt real quick with the support of a few honest people.
So now I don’t even expect a thank you. Strangers ask for help on a frequent basis and wherever I can, I will help. Apart from the media who requests for interviews or University students who use this blog as case studies or my homeschooling journey experience, what brings me the most joy is being able to help individuals who are suffering and struggling. Genuine ones.
I am currently thinking of one such woman who resides in Brunei who reached out to me with her struggles.
‘Dear CS, if you are reading, this is for you.
Until today, we have yet to meet but I think of you frequently and pray for you and your children, including your third angel. I pray for your continued peace and happiness and I pray that everything is falling into place for you since 2012 when the stars aligned us to start a conversation online. You have made me so happy by trusting me with photos of your children and again I have joy in my heart when I see the progress you have made since 2012 till earlier this year. You go girl!!! If it is any consolation at this late stage, I wanted to share with you what I found out after my Mother passed away…….
She had accidentally gotten pregnant with me at the innocent age of 16 whilst in secondary school in Taiping. By the time it was SPM year, she realised she was pregnant. Being a sporty girl, not having her period was not uncommon so she had no idea she was pregnant till much later. But as soon as she found out she was pregnant, it was almost too late to do anything. However, when her Mother found out she was pregnant, she hit the roof and ordered her to go for an abortion, with me in her tummy at 7 months before asking her to leave the home. Being a senior nurse, my grandmother knew full well that if you went for an abortion (illegal then and still is, but probably much safer now), the risk of the mother dying was very high. This was not a C-section to remove the baby professionally. This was a backyard clothes hanger kind of abortion.
My Mom begged her father to allow her to keep her baby and so she was sent to Kuching (because my Grandfather was stationed there) to hide away from school and the shame of my stressed out grandmother. And then when my Grandmother had to visit Kuching, they posted my Mom to a convent in Singapore secretly instead to have the baby, and this is why I was born in Singapore.
After having the baby, again my Mom had to fight to keep me. When Grandma found out that Mom had had the baby, she gave the baby away to a Malay family who named me Lily. After 6 months, Mom begged and begged her father to get me back so I don’t know what stunts they pulled and fought to get me back after which Mom said they put a charm on the baby because the baby cried non-stop for a long time before settling…..
But due to the rage from my grandmother that Mom had done so wrong in having an illegitimate child, she punished Mom by locking me up in a room all day in a play pen and made Mom do all the housework and laundry for 11 people and she was only allowed to see me to feed me. The baby cried all day, of course…..till Mom could no longer take it anymore and ran away from home with me. She shared a little room with 2 other girlfriends and found a job at King’s Agency as a Secretary that paid her RM100 per month and best of all, allowed her to bring her toddler to work. By the time I was 2+, she decided that it was too difficult being a single mother as most times she had to starve herself just so she could feed me. Soon after, she met a man and married him…….
This wasn’t the end of her struggles but at least I turned out the way I did. So have faith that your three angels will be just fine. I am waiting to meet you, CS, to give you that big long hug. To always believe that there is light at the end of the tunnel even when you cannot even see a glimpse of it. It is a beautiful life indeed so we must all strive to see it and enjoy it the best we can. And if we can help another without expectation, the blessings we receive back are insurmountable. Trust me, I’ve been there. And God will know if your intentions are from the depths of your heart or with an agenda before showering you with these blessings.
As my Mom would say, “Allhamdullilah!”
Her last words on her last breathe were “Allahu Akhbar……”
**************************************************************************Who is Mamapumpkin?
Mamapumpkin spent 7 years in London committing crimes to gain her Bartlett degree in Architecture. She then spent 7 years as a Stay At Home Mom raising her children as documented in this blog of over 15 years thereafter returning to the Corporate World stronger than ever as the Country Director of a British Multinational. She sets out to prove to all, that you can have anything and everything that you want; if you have that fire of desire burning within and the drive to work hard. Even better with much love.
Mamapumpkin has not only grown corporate businesses successfully in the past but has grown not one but TWO network marketing businesses in the notorious MLM (Multi-Level Marketing) industry, achieving success in under 2 years. She believes in the MLM business model but realises the DRASTIC PITFALLS and great stigma attached to it, understanding EXACTLY WHY the majority would shy away (or RUN for their lives) from ANY MLM business. But open your eyes and take time to understand it intellectually, remove your hang-ups, confirm your research, and you may just want to seize an opportunity. She did. And no, she never went about chasing people for sales. She had a sophisticated system work for her through technology and a smartphone.
She now impacts lives authentically with proven strategies amassed through the last decade of her own transformation offering online coaching programmes and always supports the underprivileged. She believes that we can all have a life of our own desires to enable real contribution into the world. But first, one needs to understand what this all means.
A beautiful life without limits.
If you wish to learn some tools to propel your life forward guaranteed, be brave enough to make contact as her life's purpose is to build people. She operates through a discovery call after which she will commit to helping you. Or not.
Most lose out on an opportunity because they are afraid they would be sold to, conned or whatever fear resides in their brain without even trying. And that's on them.
Mamapumpkin is a living testimony that women really can have a lot. Being financially and time free has enabled her to travel the world anytime, anywhere, doing anything, and she spends most of her days with her children, having fun, and supporting others wherever she can. Also having fun.
